A Life Update
This Post May Contain Affiliate Links. Please Read Our Disclosure PolicyI suppose I owe you a life update. I invited you on this crazy journey, so I should keep you in the loop, right?
(For those of you who are new here: last June I moved to Pittsburgh. If you need to catch up, it all started here and here.)
As much I would like to tell you that moving to Pittsburgh has dramatically changed my life, made everything happier / better, and opened up oodles of opportunities, I can’t … yet. I had hoped that relocating would be enough. – That a different place, more people, new and exciting activities, etc. would be the ticket to opening me up to a supremely happy existence. However, it just didn’t happen. Part of me didn’t want to write this post because I am embarrassed to still be in much the same situation seven months after moving here.
I know I only have myself to blame. Although I went to events, markets, restaurants, coffees shops, etc., I didn’t give it enough, do enough, put myself out there enough, or try hard enough. I could list a million reasons (some better than others), but they’d just be excuses.
To be fair, it hasn’t all been miserable and unsuccessful. I’ve met some people and made a couple new friends, plus I’m genuinely enjoying this urban location. I find so much joy in visiting local coffee shops, experiencing new-to-me foods, seeing city sites, etc. I’m glad I’m here. I’m happy I took the risk of moving here. However, in my mind, I just thought I’d be further along. Great expectations I suppose.
With that being said, I’m excited 2018 is here. I’ve spent the past two weeks in kind of a haze, bummed about my current situation, but that has to end. It’s time to hit the reset button and try again. I’m not quite sure how yet, but I’m planning and working on ways to be where I want to be. In fact, last week I hired a life coach as recommended by a reader. I’m hoping to make many positive changes through that.
I do realize that some of you are sick of hearing the same story again and again. I get it. I hate telling it over and over. How many times have I made proclamations here only to find myself in the same situation a few months down the road? Too many to count. But I guess there is something to be said for continuing to try. Life may kick me down, but I’m not going to let it keep me down. I’ve got to get it correct one of these times, right?
You also might be wondering about my house in St. Marys. Well, I sold it. I had no intention of doing so. However, a few months after my move, an opportunity presented itself, and I couldn’t say no. I knew the St. Marys house wasn’t my forever home, so it was time to let it go. It also happens that the folks who are buying the house want the contents, so packing up and moving shouldn’t be too hard. Naturally, I’ll be taking personal items, but I’m going to do my best to keep things to a minimum.
I’m not sad about selling, so please don’t be sad for me. I had a great run with that house, and thankfully, I have many pages here on IBC by which to remember it. If anything, I’m feeling anxious and unsettled about simply not having a “home.” Not the physical structure, but I place where I feel comfortable, a place where I belong.
So now what? Well, I’ve been house hunting in Pittsburgh. In fact, I was inches away from making an offer on a place, but my financing kept falling through. Even though things are in order now, and I could put in an offer today, I’m taking those many failed attempts as a sign from the universe to continue the search.
As grateful as I am for my apartment and the opportunities it’s given me, I can tell you that apartment living is not for me. I’m itching to be in a house again. Unfortunately, the housing market in Pittsburgh is rather slow this time of year, so my search for a house may take a little longer than I’d like. I suppose that’s a good thing though. It seems best not to rush things. It also gives me time to pause and figure out what I want and where I want to be.
So that’s what’s been going on in my personal life.
I had thought about including a bit about the blog and my direction for it, but I’ll save that for another post. In addition to my personal uncertainties, I’ve been struggling with the blog as well. (This was probably apparent in my almost three-week hiatus from IBC and social media.) I’m certain at some point I’ll reach out for your feedback and advice. Thanks for your patience in my absence.
I could go on and share more details, but I think that pretty much covers things. If you have questions, let me know in the comments, and I’ll do my best to answer them. I’m sure I’ve forgotten something.
As always, thank you for your love, support, and loyalty. You are dear to me.
So many warm wishes coming your way. You put so much beauty out there, Michael, and enhance so many people’s lives with your blog. I’m launching a blog next month, and—while we have different topics—I hope mine is half as meaningful to readers as yours! You’re an inspiration!
Totally happens! I think so highly of you for sharing this with everyone. A lot of people will certainly relate, as we’ve all been through these kinds of experiences at one time or another. How you handle it is most definitely what is important. You’re killing it and will keep doing so in the future, I’m sure. You’re a gem, and I’m excited to see what the future brings for you!
I indentify with you so much, and find myself questioning where I’m at, what’s next. I had someone tell me when they feel like this they just do the next thing. Then the next thing after that, until things begin to feel more settled. And to have grace with ourselves, that one is hard. Hugs from WA xoxo Tanya
I think you are great!! I like these posts. A life coach sounds like a great sounding board and guide. I wish I lived in Pittsburgh.
Hi Michael,
I would echo the sentiment from the other comments at how much we appreciate you sharing your life which very much includes your personal journey and story!
Please give yourself the grace to work through this time in your life. Change takes time, hard work and a lot of time spent outside your comfort zone to get there! Keep at it, keep your head up and keep us updated so we can encourage you along the way. Don’t allow the Instagram filtered world of others be your measurement, I hope you seek your own happiness and peace and recognize how much light you bring to the world just by being yourself!
Wishing you all the best in 2018.
I don’t think a single person thinks less of you for dealing with the same things over and over… I’m pretty sure that is almost always how life goes. We are always just doing our best to take baby steps in any direction. We moved across the country this past August and I tell you, just getting your home slightly in order takes about a year it feels like– let alone all the plans and improvements, those take even longer! So, I would give yourself some grace of thinking you should be farther along at this point… I’m still definitely in the “looking for new friends” stage and only have one room slightly how I would like it to be. I hope you do find your excitement for the blog again… I sure do enjoy following along with you.
Michael,
I just want to encourage you to find a church where you can come to know Jesus Christ. I think that is the friendship you are missing and searching for. I know some Reformed Presbyterian churches in the Pittsburgh area are very good. Reach out.
7 months is not very long in the grand scheme of things so don’t get too down about it. I am so excited for your house hunting journey. It will be fun to see where you land. I can’t wait to see you in Austin soon! You are the best 🙂
I have always been afraid of that “pause” and would rush around to not feel uncomfortable or fear. It never served me well. You are much wiser than I was at your age. Sit in the pause and try to savor this time. It took me more years than I am willing to admit but I have learned to love that time and seeking. I hope you do to. Wishing you the best of luck!
I’m a newer reader, but I wanted to stop by and say I really appreciate your candor. Honestly, if you asked me for a “life update” right now it wouldn’t be glowing, either. But sometimes that’s how things are, and that’s ok. I’m a big believer that we learn from from every test and every trial. Hang in there, new friend.
Don’t apologize for being so real! That’s so, so hard to come by on social media. How many of us have been where you are? Or are there now? 🙋🏼♀️ There’s comfort in knowing you aren’t alone. You’ll get there. It does feel a bit refreshing to start a new year and begin again, or keep going or whatever! You’re doing great. Best of luck with house hunting and buying-always love and appreciate your content. Xo
I am a new follower, and I really like your style, and honesty. So many bloggers are pushing sales almost on a daily basis, not what I’m interested in. Stay try to younand you’ll be fine!
Thanks for the update. I wished I lived in Pittsburgh so I could be friends with you!! I hope you get everything figured out.
Will you be posting a recap on a final “house” tour of the house you sold? Would love it see it all final in one place. I’ve been following for years.
Please don’t apologize for “these kinds of” posts – you really don’t do them often, and they are a part of who you are. I think you are incredibly brave, doing what you’re doing, and I am excited to see where this next step takes you. You really are my absolute favorite inspiration blog, and I have never gotten tired of your posts like I have occasionally with other bloggers. Keep your chin up!
Thanks for the update. I don’t want to add more to you list , but I would love it if you wrote a book! You have so many great ideas and I often refer back to your blog for ideas and recipes. I just love your style and your creativity. Hang in there and best wishes!
Thanks Kathy! Maybe SOMEDAY! 😉
xo Michael
Love this Michael! It’s so great to be open and honest! Life is not always peachy and I don’t think your readers think any less of you for being open about this. Some bloggers never show the not so pretty side, and that’s not real. We all have our ups and downs! You are so brave for writing about this many times! I’m so excited for you to find a house to call your own! Also i am so happy for you for the next coming weeks! I know it will be life changing and I don’t even know how to explain it! Don’t be too hard on yourself, people still love you even if you don’t have fresh content daily! I’m excited to see what you have in store for 2018! Just go at your own pace!! Hugs to you!
It’s so great to hear all of this. Thank you Hannah. I’m excitied and hopeful for the future. Thank you!
xo Michael
Gosh Michael…so sorry this is happening. I have been there. like being very discontent with where I am at and unsure of next step-it is so frustrating. Recently, I have just been telling myself-maybe things are supposed to be like this for now and just go with it. Being frustrated and blue-is just not fun and being stressed ALL the time-ugh, horrible. My hope for you is to just be content-that is not failure. You are very successful-something you have to remind yourself of. I so enjoy you! I would sure interject some blog ideas if you need them. Sometimes reaching out to others really helps with creativity and also keeps you in touch with others! Good luck!
Thank you so much Vanessa, I always appreciate you comments here. And yes, content is the goal. I think day-by-day may be the best approach. Thanks again!
xo Michael
I just Love everything about you. I’ve been following along for years, pulling for you.
I am a bit of an introvert. It’s hard, hard, HARD for me to make new friends. I moved almost 2 years ago and struggled with a social group. So, I read How to Win Friends and Influence People. It helped. Then, I thought about the type of friends I wanted. When I saw qualities I liked in people out and about, I introduced myself. It has been hard. Not all people want someone trying to be a bestie. I never had someone do that for me and I would have loved it in darker, lonelier days of mine. Anyhow, I realized for ME I had to go out of my comfort level and actually BE the person snatching up friends left and right. I couldn’t wait for that person to find me.
I’m sure life is difficult for you in your situation despite all the blessings you have. For me, you are a huge bright spot in my social media life. I don’t know you at all but I honestly, genuinely love all your posts and your energy.
Keep on doing what you’re doing. Look for little ways to interact with peers. Throw a favorite things party (that was huge for me -I wanted free stuff from friends but the group that came was so much fun. We still do fun nights together.), just do what you want. Go be that person you want to be.
Hugs.
Carrie, thank you so much for sharing all of this. It’s so comforting and helpful. (I will definitely be checking out that book.) I’m also so thankful to know you love what I share here and on social. There’s been a lot of self doubt in that department, so I appreciate hearing that. Thank you!!
xo Michael
Thanks for the update. You have all of us pulling for you!! Genuinely hoping the 2018 is truly a year of new beginnings and great joy for you.
Thank you Alison! Wishing the same for you!
xo Michael
Oh, Michael…I completely understand where you at. I have often felt compelled to do something different only to end up in the same place where I started. Even with much effort, it can be hard. Pittsburgh is a great city, having moved away from there just a few years ago, back to my hometown of Toledo. Good luck in your house hunt! I wish you all the best in 2018!
Thank you so much, Colleen! Hope you have a great year too.
xo Michael