What’s the Tea: My Gram


I try not to do these “What’s the Tea” updates too frequently because I know that most of you are here for design tips and recipes. Occasionally, life warrants another update, so please bear with me.

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Several weeks ago I told you that my Gram had a stroke. Unfortunately, she was not able to recover, and I am deeply saddened to tell you that she passed away a little over a week ago. She spent time in the hospital and a nursing home, and her condition was up and down. In her final days, we fed her, held her hand, hugged and kissed her, and said prayers. She struggled in the end. As hard as it was to say goodbye, it was time. Her service was held two years to the day after my grandfather (her husband) passed away.

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As much as I’d love to chat about my grandparents right now, I’d be just a babbling mess of tears, so I’ll save my stories of them for future posts. I did, however, want to give you an update and thank you for all of your thoughts and prayers.

What's the Tea with IBC | Inspired by Charm

It probably goes without saying, that May was a busy and trying month. I’m very happy that June is here. The sun is shining, and although Gram is no longer with us, I have another angel watching over me as I try to figure out my life.

Just this past weekend, I came back to my somewhat abandoned apartment in Pittsburgh, and now I’m finally starting to settle in. (I share daily updates on Instagram Stories … if you’re interested.) My first day back here was tough. The cats came with me this time, and watching them struggle to adjust to their new environment broke my heart. Coupled with the recent loss of Gram, it wasn’t much fun around here.

However, five days in, things are getting better. The cats are adapting to the new space which makes me so happy. And I seem to be adjusting, too.

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I am genuinely happy to be living here. As I drive the streets and walk the sidewalks of Pittsburgh, I think of all the things I want to do and can do. All the places I want to eat and all of the experiences I want to create. It’s almost overwhelming but in the best possible way.

I am feeling a little pressure, however. (Which is mostly of my own making) I want everything to happen at once, even though I know that is totally unrealistic. Time seems so fleeting, and I feel like I’m running out of it.

On top of that, I’m also anxious about making friends, I’m nervous about going on dates. I’m trying to push myself into new adventures, but at the same time I need and want to feel comfortable. (Or does comfort need to go out the window at this point?) How does a person do these things in his mid-30s? Ack! I should have all of this taken care of by now. Anywho, for now, I’m taking things day-by-day, moment-by-moment, and just hoping for the best.

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I have made great progress in my apartment, however. As you can see, I’ve found several pieces to start making this place feel like home. I promise to whip up a mini-home tour for you soon. Be warned, however, that this is the only section that’s somewhat presentable. Behind the camera, my TV is sitting on the box it came in. Not cute.

In other news, I need to get my food intake back on track. Living in the city doesn’t mean I’m on a permanent vacation where my diet can consist mostly of cinnamon rolls, pasta, cheese, and multiple glasses of rosé. With the progress I’ve made in losing weight this year, the last thing I want to do is backslide. Thankfully, I have several farmers markets nearby, lots of places to run, and a gym in my building. I truly have no excuse.

What's the Tea with IBC | Inspired by Charm

While I’m certain I have more life updates, I think that’s about enough for today. Before I sign off, though, I have a quick question for you. Do you enjoy these more personal / working-through-life style posts? I ask because I always have lots of thoughts rolling around in my head. I’m happy to share them, but I know this can easily verge on oversharing. I’m curious about what you might like, so any feedback is greatly appreciated.

Hope you’re having a wonderful week, my friends!

Disclosure: This blog post may contain affiliate links as part of the Amazon Services LLC Associate Programs and other affiliate services. This means that inspiredbycharm.com receives a small commission by linking to Amazon.com and other sites at no cost to the readers.

Posted By at 11:23 AM
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  • jenw at

    I’m sorry about your grandma, I’m glad you have the peace of another angel with you though.

    To answer your question: I enjoy the life/thoughts/etc posts and would like to read as many as you want to post. You are a person and I like seeing the posts that are about what is happening with you as a person. If I wanted a blog with just impersonal design posts I’d go to a brand blog or one of those huge conglomerate design blogs (for the record, I don’t really care for either of those type blogs!).

  • bobbie at


  • Elle at

    YOU are the inspiration behind IBC. I like knowing what’s happening in your life. I follow bloggers because I care about them. Bushels of hugs to you!

  • Allie at

    So sorry for your loss. Your Gram looks like an awesome person.

    Agreed with JENW. Your personal content is interesting and appreciated. Keep doing you!

  • Rachel at

    First, I’m sorry to hear about your grandmother.

    Second, I love the lifestyle, here’s what’s going on, good and ugly style posts. For me, these posts are what make blogs unique and not just a bunch of pretty pictures. I want to get to know as much of your life as you are comfortable sharing, even when it’s not Instagram perfect. I find that blogs that never posts “behind the scenes this is my life” style posts tend to be a bit flat.

    Also, I’m glad that your new apartment is starting to feel a bit like home. Regarding the nerves and comfort zone thing, I think you’ll find a nice mix. You have to push some (maybe take a class at the local gym to meet people) while also allowing yourself to naturally find your new normal.

  • Talia at

    I am so sorry for your loss. Grandparents are such special people in our lives. Please know I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers. You have an angel looking over you.

    I love this type of post. I feel as though I get to ‘know’ you and you are such a great person. There is no time frame in how your life should unfold – just go with what feels right and good at the time. All will work out. Perhaps ease into things – join clubs or community groups. Let the relationships (friendship and personal) grow organically? Just a thought…

    Wishing you

  • Erin M at

    Sorry for your loss. My condolences.

    I love hearing about your life updates. You’re the reason I come to this blog. I love your posts and learning more about you.

    From a fan of years (!)


  • Denise at

    I’m so sorry about your grandmother – be gentle with yourself right now!

    I love your personal posts. LOVE THEM. I miss it when you go for long stretches without them.

  • Gracie at

    I love reading these types of posts. In fact, there actually my favorite. I like the decorating ones too, don’t get me wrong, they are what brought me to your blog originally and I would never want those to go away either, but I like hearing (or I guess I should say reading) what’s really going on in your life. It’s easy to look at pretty blog posts from different people and Facebook posts and think their lives are so perfect and start to get really down on myself. It’s refreshing to know that we share many of the same struggles and that I’m not alone and to see how you work through yours. Your just a lot braver than me and I commend you for it! I’m usually to afraid to share what I’m going through with others and ask for help, but I’m thankful that you do and I hope you find encouragement and support from your readers when you do. 😀

  • Annie at

    I am so sorry about your grandmother. You were so lucky to have her in your life for so long. I enjoy all your posts (can’t read the ones about cake though since I am trying to be good…no sugar) The life posts are what makes this blog this blog. I’m rooting for you Michael.

  • Laura at

    So sorry about your Grandma!

    Yes, please continue to post life/thoughts/etc posts….along with the recipes…yummy….and decorating! I just love it all!

    Thank you.

  • Ky at

    If this community can help support you through things, then absolutely post away. You are a joyful part of our daily lives and I’m sure we’d love to return the favor with encouragement when it’s needed. Much love as you remember your beautiful Gran – looks like a life well lived, and I’m sure she was proud of you.

  • Debra at

    Hi Michael —
    The “What’s the Tea with IBC” is the icing on the cake for my love affair with your blog. Thanks for sharing and keeping it real. Condolences on your Grandma’s passing — love the pictures you shared.

  • Amanda Taylor at

    I love these types of posts! Also, this is your blog so I think you should blog what you want to :). As for having it all figured it out and wanting everything all at once, I totally get that. I’ve been in my house for 7 years and I’m still not done, but when I have an idea I want it all right now. Even though it’s not really possible… I finally realized (after 35 years of life! LOL) that it’s ok to take time and be slow and methodical about things and just let them evolve. And while I’m not actively looking for relationships I also find that the less I stress about them the more they seem to come my way. Does that even make sense? Who knows?! I’m just a crazy cat lady according to all my friends. Ha!

  • Jason at


    I am so sorry to hear of the loss of your Grandmother and my thoughts and prayers are going to you and your family. She and your family are as blessed to have had you in their lives as you were to have them in yours I am sure!

    I enjoy the personal posts (as well as everyone else seems to) and much of what you write about is familiar to me by what I have going on in life and I’m sure for your other readers too.

    • Jason at

      oops I meant *to have had and have you in their lives….. and *were and are to have them in yours

  • KathyT at

    Share what is comfortable, but remember there are a lot of crazies out there in internet-land!

    My sympathies on your loss. It’s never good when too many life changing events occur at the same time, but somehow that always seems to happen.

    I understand your anxieties about getting started in a new place. I’ve found the best way to meet people is by doing things I’m interested in…take an art or photography class at a museum, look for a book club through the library or a cool book store, join a theater group…most cities offer all sorts of free/cheap events, especially in the summer!

    Best wishes to you and the kitties!

  • KC at

    Thank you for sharing the beautiful pictures of your Grandmother. It’s not easy to lose a “Grandma”, mine passed away 2 years ago and it’s still tough. May the memories made with her over the years bring you peace.

  • B at

    There is a sense of connection that come from the authentic and vulnerableness of these posts. I personally love them and hope you feel the support of all of us readers – it is so difficult to lose those you love, grief washes over you, and it’s a tough time. More so, no one really has life together! I think of life as sine wave – there are moments that it is up then moments that it’s down – both are to be appreciated. Life is constantly changing, having it together is a rooze!

  • Silvana Post at

    Sorry to hear about your loss Michael but glad to hear that you and the kitties are adjusting. Can’t wait to see what you do to the place. Love your design ideas!

  • Debra W at

    Michael, I am sorry about the loss of both of your Grandparents. Much love to you. I do want to hear more post about your life. You feel more like friend and family to me than just a blog that I read. Everything that you write about whether it be about cooking, design, diy, etc. I love to read all of it. Please continue to share, it touches my heart. Much joy and happiness I send to you.

  • Beverly at

    Sorry to hear of your loss. I am new to following your posts and love your style of blogging and love the personal stories along with the decorating. The recipes are also great! I look forward to hearing about all of your adventures in Pittsburgh…love that city!

  • Pam Clark at


  • Emily at

    Suddenly all these bloggers I’ve been following for years are apologizing for sharing glimpses of their personal lives – I don’t get it. If I just wanted to look at pretty pictures, I’d look at a magazine or browse Pinterest. I read blogs because I love the stories and context behind the pictures. Heck, i remember the blogging days of 2008 when posts only included a few grainy point and shoot pics at all! Please keep sharing. I am so excited about your move – I went to college in pgh and no longer live there, so I love seeing the city though your eyes.

  • Reenie at

    So sorry about your Gma.

    I love to hear/read/see a mix of things on your blog.

    Glad your kitties are settling in and you are too. Can’t wait to see what you’ve done so far. Take your time……

  • Julia - Vintage with Laces at

    I’m so sorry for your loss, Micheal. Your grandma looks like a kind woman. It’s good that you could be with her during her last days.
    Moving is always very difficult for cats. I’m glad that your sweet cats are starting to adjust to their new home.
    I wish you all the best for any upcoming dates and hope you’ll find the guy of your dreams soon.
    Please continue to post some personal things as well.

  • Ramona Chester at

    Michael, sorry for the loss of your grandmother. I truly enjoyed your post. I think we see so many – “oh look at my perfect little life” posts, that it is good to see uncertainty coupled with courage to forge ahead. Carry on, charmingly, and continue to inspire.

  • Vikki at

    Dear Michael, No matter how much we know that a loved one would be better to be at peace and free from pain it is so difficult for us to let them go. No doubt your Gram knew how much you loved her. I’m sure you have wonderful memories of her and your times together. Concentrate on how she would want you to be happy every day. At times when I am feeling overwhelmed with life I think how truly blessed I am to have what I have and live the life I live. That is my reality check. You are so smart and talented. I love reading and seeing everything you post. ((Hugs)) Vikki in VA

  • Kristen at

    I’m so sorry about your Grandma’s passing. It’s so hard to adjust to the mindset of not being able to call a loved one for a chat. Thinking of you.

    Regarding your more personal posts – I LOVE them! These are my favorite type of posts from all the bloggers I read.

    • Michael Wurm, Jr. at

      Thank you and I appreciate knowing that!

      xo Michael

  • Jennifer at

    I’m so sorry about your grandma. It sounds like she was very lucky to have you as her grandson. I’m newish to your blog but I want to say that your personal posts are actually my favorite. I’m in a situation where I’m contemplating some life changes so it’s comforting to hear about how you are working through yours. 🙂

    • Michael Wurm, Jr. at

      Happy to hear that and thank you so much.

      xo Michael

  • Damara at

    Hi Michael- Yes! I love posts like this. I came for the recipes and designs and stayed for you. Sorry for your loss, I wish all the best for you (and your cats).

    • Michael Wurm, Jr. at

      Thank you very much!

      xo Michael

  • Lori at

    I love following along with your life. I think it makes it more interesting that we connect with you on a personal level. My favorite parts of your blog are just your every day life. I also love how you inspire us with all your creative ideas. Thank you:)

  • Peggy at

    Love hearing about your life.

  • Funky Junk Interiors - Donna at

    I am sorry for the passing of someone so special to you. I look forward to hearing those stories when you are ready to share them.

    And yes… please keep talking about your move and changes in your life. I love hearing that I’m not alone in my own issues. xo So glad the settling in phase has taken place!

    Now go have some fun! I sometimes think ‘scary’ should be replaced with ‘personal growth’…

  • Gail at

    Michael your “What’s the Tea” updates are the icing on the cake to a blog that I love! Your cooking, decorating and travel ideas are all so good and your Instagram pictures are perfection. But it is sharing a little of your personal story that really draws me in to your blog. There is something very vulnerable about sharing your ups and downs but because I know a little bit of your back story I am really rooting for you to be happy and successful in Pittsburgh!

  • Vanessa at

    I’m so sorry for your loss…gram’s really are the best people. I have recently lost my grandma and it has been very hard. I like to think that I have some of her qualities and that sort helps me to cope with the sadness. I can tell that your gram was very special-she has looks like she had a very kind heart. Please keep posting personal stuff-it really does help me as I am sure that it helps you grow and learn. I am so happy for you and your “new” adventure!

  • Sarah at

    I’m so sorry for your loss of your grandmother. Sending you a hug.

    And I agree with everyone else, I love these posts and they are the ones I’m most excited to see! I totally want to be your friend, but I live all the way in Texas, so I’ll have to be content with just reading your updates 🙂

  • Ardith at

    You’ve received many, absolutely beautiful responses, Michael, and I agree with them. My condolences on the loss of your lovely gram, though I am grateful you both had a long and wonderful relationship. Share what you wish on your blog, as you always do with grace. Best wishes on settling into your new, cool pad. Cheers, Ardith

  • Ellen at

    Michael – I read this somewhere and I will share it with you. “Never regret a day in your life: Good days give happiness, Bad days give experience, Worst days give lessons and Best days give memories.” Please share all of your days on What’s the Tea! My heartfelt condolences on the loss of your beloved Grandmother.

    • Michael Wurm, Jr. at

      Love this! Thanks so much Ellen!

      xo Michael

  • beverly e at

    I’m so sorry to hear of your Gram’s passing. It’s easy to see from the beautiful pictures that you and she shared a loving bond. As for your Life Posts, you have achieved a good balance. Thanks for sharing your life with all your “other mothers” out here in Blogland. Sending hugs of comfort and encouragement!

  • CGinAZ at

    So sorry about your Nana. I’m sure she loved you with all her heart. And you her. I am struck by the anniversary date of her husband’s death. I find this happens often. Some date of importance to the person. Birthdays often. Anyway, take comfort in knowing she is with her husband now, abd no longer struggling.

    I do want to hear about what’s happening in your life. As do we all, I’m sure. If I had to choose one over the other, personal over style, I’d choose personal.

  • donna at

    I’m so sorry of your loss. It is clear that you loved her very much. I lost my grandmother 15 years ago and I teared up as I read your post. Grandparents love us in such a special way. …and you will always have that love.

    I really enjoy your writing whether about style and design or your life. I hope you keep it up.

    Best of luck on this new adventure! I’m envious.

  • Bonnie at

    I do enjoy your personal life stories. I’m so sorry to hear about your grandmother’s passing and I will keep you and your family in my prayers. I lost my dad, who was almost 93 years old, on May 31. He had always lived independently up until March when he suffered a mild fall. His health seemed to go downhill from there and it’s hard to believe that he is gone. I lost my mom 2 years ago in May. They were married for almost 71 years again and it’s a comfort to me that they’re in heaven together now as they were deeply in love.

  • Jess at

    Love your personal posts! Keep them coming!

  • Sarah Ollis at

    So sorry to hear about your Gram. My Granny just passed away this weekend after her 3rd stroke in 3 weeks. I understand what you’re going through! Prayers for peace and comfort for you and your family in the upcoming days. I know reflecting on the wonderful memories with her will help.

    Also, I love your “What’s the Tea” posts! I enjoy getting to know the person behind the home decor and recipes. It makes your blog so much more real and relatable. Keep it up! 🙂

  • Karen Mary at

    Oh, I absolutely love the photo of you and your gram. So much love! And I’m so very sorry for your loss.

    Your “What’s the Tea” posts keep it real; don’t want us thinking your life is always as perfect as it looks, right? 🙂

    You’re so talented and obviously appreciate the beautiful things in life! Love your blog; hoping the one I’m in the process of developing will be half as wonderful!

  • Kimmy at

    So sorry to hear about your Grandma. Hugs and love for you. I like your personal stories!

  • Lindy at

    I am so sorry to hear about your Grandma, Michael. I am sending you hugs & prayers. I am sure she is watching over you (and cheering you on!) as you adjust to the many changes in your life. Please continue to tell your story. It will help those of us that may be going through some of the same things. The perfect mix of stories is what makes your blog one of my favorites!

  • Danielle at

    Hi Michael,

    Long time fellow Pennsylvanian reader here. So very sorry to hear about your loss. I always find your personal posts refreshing becuse so many blogs/social media feed are so carefully curated as if life is never messy or imperfect. It’s nice to meet the person behind the blog and share in your highs/lows. Please keep the “tea” coming!

    On a more positive note, I wish you the best of luck as you embark on this new journey. I admire your willingness to make positive changes in your life! Carpe diem!!!

  • Jana at

    I’m so sorry about your grandmother. I’m just now catching up on your site now that I have a little down-time, and I just wanted to reach out and give you a virtual hug. Your sadness over your grandmother and your uneasiness after a move are so familiar to me. Just know that you’re not alone, and if the personal posts provide a bit of comfort, then let it rip! I always feel inspired after a visit to your site (or even a quick peek via Pinterest), and I hope things are looking up for you.

  • Tina at

    I’m so sorry to hear about your grandmother. This time can be tough. Just keep her in your heart.

    I love hearing personal posts among the decorating & DIY. It helps us to get to know you and feel like we are making a small connection. Keep ’em coming!

    Good luck on your Pittsburgh adventures!

  • Janet at

    Hi Michael! This comes rather late but just read your post. I’m so sorry about your Grandma. Give yourself time and enjoy your memories, cry when you need to. Grief is not a linear process. Enough “advice”, though. On another note, share whatever you feel comfortable with. I think I speak for many who follow your blog, we love not just what you do but who you are, which is a loving and caring individual. So, share away any thoughts you have. We can all learn from each other. Peace, love and prayers.

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